I watched The Punk Singer this weekend. Though I was familiar with Bikini Kill before I watched the documentary, I can’t say I was too knowledgeable about Kathleen Hana’s life. If you know me well, you know I adore Courtney Love. I realize there is much that is unlikable about Love. She was a junkie, a questionable mother, and committed a variety of other sins. After watching The Punk Singer, I also learned Love punched Hanna at a show, seemingly for no reason. Love is far from perfect. But Live Through This is one of my favorite albums. For me, like many others, the album said many things I was thinking and feeling. Love was questioning her role as a woman. She wanted be more than what society said she could be. She, like Hanna, also wanted to be sexy and yet, she wanted to be able to define what that meant for her. They were/are idols, but they were/are flawed. Their flaws made us love them more. Because they were real and human. Love and Hanna created new versions of what it meant to be a woman.

I have talked about Roxane Gay before. Her latest book, Bad Feminist, was just released this month. It is a collection of essays about gender, sexuality, race, pop culture, and obviously, feminism. For Gay, being a feminist does not mean just one thing. Certainly, a feminist believes in the equality of all people regardless of gender, race, sexuality, or class. But Gay admits to enjoying things that don’t necessarily adhere to feminist ideals. She finds herself drawn to songs that are clearly demeaning to women because there is a catchy beat. She sometimes laughs at inappropriate jokes. Though she might not perfectly adhere to feminist ideals, she considers herself a feminist. Gay argues feminism needs to be more inclusive. For her, there should be room for all kinds of feminists. This resonates with me. I am a feminist, but I also have less than stellar reactions and opinions. Certainly, there are lines that should not be crossed. For Gay, rape jokes are pretty much never acceptable. But a feminist is not one thing. Different women define themselves differently. This means  people should be able to define their feminism differently. Roxane Gay, Courtney Love, and Kathleen Hanna are all wildly different women. They are all imperfect. They are also all feminists. And it is up to each one of us to define what being a feminist means to us.